Gecko
Well-known member
All wanting a piece of the action no doubt
B
Brendan
Well-known member
Amazing what happens, got a new aunt that no one knew about
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pettsy
Well-known member
Lancs Lad
Well-known member
The only football related meme I've seen funny
or... interesting
Gecko
Well-known member
Important security question -
Does MI6 have it's own beer?
Does MI6 have it's own beer?
Canal Navvy
Well-known member
The answer to that one you'd already know if you needed to 
Left hooker
Well-known member
Lone Ranger and Tonto walked into a saloon and sat down to
drink a Beer. After a few minutes, a big tall cowboy walked in and said
"Who Owns the big white horse outside?"
The Lone Ranger stood
up, hitched his gun belt, and said, "I do....Why?"
The cowboy
looked at the Lone Ranger and said, "I just thought you'd like to know
that your horse is about dead outside!"
The Lone Range and Tonto rushed outside and sure enough Silver was ready to die from
heat exhaustion. The Lone Ranger got the horse water and soon Silver
was starting to feel a little better.
The Lone Ranger turned
to Tonto and said, "Tonto, I want you to run around Silver and see if
> you can create enough of a breeze to make him start to feel better."
> Tonto said, "Sure, Kemosabe" and took off running circles around
> Silver. Not able to do anything else but wait, the Lone Ranger
> returned to the saloon to finish his drink. A few minutes later,
> another cowboy struts into the bar and asks, "Who owns that big white
> horse outside?"
The Lone Ranger stands again, and claims, "I do, what's wrong with him this time?"
The cowboy looks him in the eye and says,
"Nothing, but you left your injun running"!
drink a Beer. After a few minutes, a big tall cowboy walked in and said
"Who Owns the big white horse outside?"
The Lone Ranger stood
up, hitched his gun belt, and said, "I do....Why?"
The cowboy
looked at the Lone Ranger and said, "I just thought you'd like to know
that your horse is about dead outside!"
The Lone Range and Tonto rushed outside and sure enough Silver was ready to die from
heat exhaustion. The Lone Ranger got the horse water and soon Silver
was starting to feel a little better.
The Lone Ranger turned
to Tonto and said, "Tonto, I want you to run around Silver and see if
> you can create enough of a breeze to make him start to feel better."
> Tonto said, "Sure, Kemosabe" and took off running circles around
> Silver. Not able to do anything else but wait, the Lone Ranger
> returned to the saloon to finish his drink. A few minutes later,
> another cowboy struts into the bar and asks, "Who owns that big white
> horse outside?"
The Lone Ranger stands again, and claims, "I do, what's wrong with him this time?"
The cowboy looks him in the eye and says,
"Nothing, but you left your injun running"!
pettsy
Well-known member
doobin
Well-known member
Bucket on wheels
Well-known member
Bucket on wheels
Well-known member
Time for a little laughter ... You need to think around "old people".
A tale from the wild, wild West ...
"An old woman walked up and tied her old mule to the hitching post.
As she stood there, brushing some of the dust from her face and clothes, a young gunslinger stepped out of the saloon with a gun in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other.
He looked at the woman and laughed,
"Hey old woman, have you ever danced?"
The woman looked up at the gunslinger and said, "No ... I never did dance ... Never really wanted to"
A crowd has gathered as the young gunslinger grinned and said, "Well you old bag, you're gonna dance now!", and started shooting at the old woman's feet.
The old woman prospector - not wanting to have her toes blown off- started hopping around. Many were laughing.
When his last bullet was fired, the gunslinger, still laughing, holstered his gun and turned around to go back into the saloon.
The old woman turned to her pack mule, pulled out a double-barrelled shotgun and cocked both hammers. The loud clicks carried clearly through the desert air, and the crowd immediately stopped laughing.
The gunslinger heard the sounds too, and turned around very slowly. The silence was almost deafening. The crowd watched tensely as he stared at the woman and the large gaping holes of those twin barrels.
The barrels of the shotgun never wavered in her hands as she quietly said, "Son, have you ever kissed a mule's ass?"
The gunslinger swallowed hard and said, "No m'am, but I've always wanted too"
THERE ARE FIVE LESSONS HERE FOR ALL OF US:
1 - Never be arrogant.
2 - Don't waste ammunition.
3 - Whiskey makes you think you're smarter than you are.
4 - Always make sure you know who has the power.
5 - Don't mess with old people; they didn't get old by being stupid."
~John Mitchell~
"An old woman walked up and tied her old mule to the hitching post.
As she stood there, brushing some of the dust from her face and clothes, a young gunslinger stepped out of the saloon with a gun in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other.
He looked at the woman and laughed,
"Hey old woman, have you ever danced?"
The woman looked up at the gunslinger and said, "No ... I never did dance ... Never really wanted to"
A crowd has gathered as the young gunslinger grinned and said, "Well you old bag, you're gonna dance now!", and started shooting at the old woman's feet.
The old woman prospector - not wanting to have her toes blown off- started hopping around. Many were laughing.
When his last bullet was fired, the gunslinger, still laughing, holstered his gun and turned around to go back into the saloon.
The old woman turned to her pack mule, pulled out a double-barrelled shotgun and cocked both hammers. The loud clicks carried clearly through the desert air, and the crowd immediately stopped laughing.
The gunslinger heard the sounds too, and turned around very slowly. The silence was almost deafening. The crowd watched tensely as he stared at the woman and the large gaping holes of those twin barrels.
The barrels of the shotgun never wavered in her hands as she quietly said, "Son, have you ever kissed a mule's ass?"
The gunslinger swallowed hard and said, "No m'am, but I've always wanted too"
THERE ARE FIVE LESSONS HERE FOR ALL OF US:
1 - Never be arrogant.
2 - Don't waste ammunition.
3 - Whiskey makes you think you're smarter than you are.
4 - Always make sure you know who has the power.
5 - Don't mess with old people; they didn't get old by being stupid."
V8Druid
do it as well as you can,but learn to do it better
brilliantTime for a little laughter ... You need to think around "old people".A tale from the wild, wild West ...
"An old woman walked up and tied her old mule to the hitching post.
As she stood there, brushing some of the dust from her face and clothes, a young gunslinger stepped out of the saloon with a gun in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other.
He looked at the woman and laughed,
"Hey old woman, have you ever danced?"
The woman looked up at the gunslinger and said, "No ... I never did dance ... Never really wanted to"
A crowd has gathered as the young gunslinger grinned and said, "Well you old bag, you're gonna dance now!", and started shooting at the old woman's feet.
The old woman prospector - not wanting to have her toes blown off- started hopping around. Many were laughing.
When his last bullet was fired, the gunslinger, still laughing, holstered his gun and turned around to go back into the saloon.
The old woman turned to her pack mule, pulled out a double-barrelled shotgun and cocked both hammers. The loud clicks carried clearly through the desert air, and the crowd immediately stopped laughing.
The gunslinger heard the sounds too, and turned around very slowly. The silence was almost deafening. The crowd watched tensely as he stared at the woman and the large gaping holes of those twin barrels.
The barrels of the shotgun never wavered in her hands as she quietly said, "Son, have you ever kissed a mule's ass?"
The gunslinger swallowed hard and said, "No m'am, but I've always wanted too"
THERE ARE FIVE LESSONS HERE FOR ALL OF US:
1 - Never be arrogant.
2 - Don't waste ammunition.
3 - Whiskey makes you think you're smarter than you are.
4 - Always make sure you know who has the power.
5 - Don't mess with old people; they didn't get old by being stupid."
~John Mitchell~
View attachment 42504
.......... and very true
Gecko
Well-known member
Bike alarm
Furniss
Well-known member
No good for me that ...I always forget
V8Druid
do it as well as you can,but learn to do it better
I think I have said before ..... had a mate who used to have a series 1 landy ... lovely little SWB ragtop .... impossible to secure realistically ..... fuel tank filler under the driver's seat --- petrol ....
he fitted a spark plug into the top of the tank and ran a lead to it from the dizzy ......
his philosophy was if he couldn't keep it, he'd make sure no one else was going to have it ....
he NEVER forgot to immobilise the security measures before driving it ....
and if we ever went anywhere in it, I hid behind a wall 'til I heard it start
Gecko
Well-known member
Similar situation, but different solution.I think I have said before ..... had a mate who used to have a series 1 landy ... lovely little SWB ragtop .... impossible to secure realistically ..... fuel tank filler under the driver's seat --- petrol ....
he fitted a spark plug into the top of the tank and ran a lead to it from the dizzy ......
his philosophy was if he couldn't keep it, he'd make sure no one else was going to have it ....
he NEVER forgot to immobilise the security measures before driving it ....
and if we ever went anywhere in it, I hid behind a wall 'til I heard it start
I got around in moke for many years.
For a couple of reasons, I'd fitted an electric fuel pump.
On the dash was a small, unlabeled switch.
To the uninitiated, the car had a range of one fuel bowl.
Bucket on wheels
Well-known member
6
6feetdown
Well-known member
Gecko
Well-known member
S
Stroppymonkey
Well-known member
With the former missus I went on a 10 day Holiday to Alderney summer 04. Hired and drove a Moke all 10 days. So much fun!!!
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